When You Fail

    How has God responded to your failure? 

One bedrock fact of the Christian faith is that no one is good enough to earn acceptance from God. You have sinned, and while you might make right decisions, the sum of your right decisions will never outweigh your sin. You are hopeless without Jesus’ saving grace. Jesus died on the cross, was brought back to life, and ascended into heaven, all to satisfy God’s justice and offer forgiveness for your sin. You have asked Jesus to forgive you, and committed your life to follow Him. Your eternity is secure. But how did God respond to you, as His child, the last time you failed, or the time before, or the time before that? The Christian faith is based on the belief that we can never be good enough, yet are accepted by God through grace. However, when a Christian fails, proving that he is not good enough, we struggle to process that failure in terms of God’s response. 

The temptation is to think of God’s response in two flawed approaches. You imagine God patting you on the head, saying, “Try again, you’ll get them next time.” Much like a little league coach encouraging the seven year old who has struck out...again. Out of his pity, knowing that a little league game does not bear the consequence that most parents believe, the coach brushes the failure off his player’s shoulder. The coach knows the failure is “no big deal” so he moves on. But God does not pat His children on the head, excusing failure without consequence.

The other flawed approach is to imagine God turning His back on you in disgust. Imagine the coach, after seeing his seven year old player strike out, turning his back on the kid as he walks back to the dugout. So disappointed that he refuses to even look at the struggling player. At times, Satan attempts to convince us God is so disappointed in us that He turns His back in disgust. 

God neither pats you on the head, nor turns His back. When you fail, you must return to the Word, return to what you know is true. Throughout the Scripture, God’s people failed. Some in catastrophic ways.  As you read the accounts of these failures, and study the theology of the Bible, you discover God responds consistently to His children’s failures, when they are broken and repentant. When God’s children repent of failure He: meets them with His love, mends them with His grace, and molds them with His discipline.

When God’s children fail, He meets them with His love. Failure conjures images of God’s disappointment, anger and wrath. During these times, we lose sight of the fact that God loves us deeply, and nothing will separate us from that love. Paul says he is convinced that nothing will separate us from the love of God. (Romans 8:38-39) Read the surrounding verses, you will discover Paul describing the love God has committed to you. God loves you because He chose to love you. In His choosing He foresaw every failure you would commit. He chose to love you with full knowledge of the event, knowing He would love you through it. 

Much like the wayward son in Jesus’ parable. We wallow in failure, deciding to return to God, hoping He will receive us as a servant. But as we make our way up the road to home, we are met by a loving father who embraces us. We are amazed by His love, but He assures us He has loved us before, during and after the failure. 

When God’s children fail, He mends them with His grace. A unique kind of brokeness accompanies failure. Failure tears away pride. Failure invites self loathing and inner condemnation. Failure might even bring you to the brink of hopelessness, tempting you to give up on life itself. You can no longer depend on your self worth for identity. You are broken beyond any repair you can accomplish under your own power. It is here that you finally understand grace. 

Until now, have you thought of grace primarily as God’s forensic answer to sin? You sin and deserve punishment, Jesus died and paid that debt, now God has forgiven that debt through your salvation in Jesus. All of that is true. But grace goes beyond a legal release. Grace heals the brokenness sin caused. Grace is as much relational as forensic. It is the grace of Jesus that will heal the hurt and pain you experience after a catastrophic failure.  

    Peter failed. He publicly denied Jesus. Even after encountering the risen Savior, Peter struggled with hopelessness. Having no clue what to do with himself, Peter returned to what he once knew. He went fishing. He fished all night, and caught nothing. As the sun rose a figure appeared on the beach, calling to the fishermen. It was the Lord. Overjoyed, Peter dove into the water and swam to shore. On that shore, Peter experienced a life changing moment with Jesus. He was healed by grace. Speaking with Peter privately, Jesus assured him that failure would not define their relationship, grace would. 

I invite you to read the account for yourself in John 21:15-19. Then  go back and read Luke 5:1-11, the first time Jesus called Peter to follow Him. You will notice the parallel between the two accounts. Jesus is gracefully restoring Peter, calling him in the same way as He did initially. Grace says the same thing to you, Jesus will mend your brokenness. 

When God’s children fail, He molds them with His discipline. God’s grace restores you even though you have failed, but he loves you too much to let you fall back into the same failure. In the wake of failure, the Lord lovingly disciplines you. This discipline is not punishment, or just desserts, it is a transformation. God uses your failure to make you more like Jesus. Hebrews 12:1-17 describes this discipline.

You are told to “lay aside every weight and sin which clings so closely.” (v. 1) Sin has led to your failure. Sin is failure’s root cause. Now, the sin that once seemed to bring pleasure has brought tragedy. You see sin’s destructive power. This is a gift, compelling you to finally lay aside the sin which has plagued you for so long. Embrace this as good. Hebrews goes on to say, “do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord.” (v. 5) God is doing a work, participate fully in His transforming grace, letting Him mold you in the aftermath of failure. The struggle will be part of the Lord creating a desire for Him rather than the sin which took His place in your life. 

In Rebuilding Your Broken World Gordon MacDonlad says, “The freest person in the world is one with an open heart, a broken spirit, and a new direction in which to travel.” Failure has given you an opportunity to be met with God’s love, mended by His grace and molded by His discipline. Do not waste this chance, let Him redirect your path, change you from within, and use you as an example of His restoring grace.